What does the verb ‘drug’ mean?
“Administer a drug to (someone) in order to induce stupor or insensibility.
“they were drugged to keep them quiet”
In a broader sense, if something is pushing us to chase illusions continuously, it has the same drug effect. And and when one falls prey to it, he is drugged, and if he lives in it for long, he ends up with regrets.
The top 5 regrets
I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me
I wish I had not worked so hard
I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings
I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends
I wish that I had let myself be happier
These are the top five regrets of the dying, captured by Bonnie Ware, a nurse who interviewed many of her patients on their deathbed, and blogged it, and then later published her book ‘The top five regrets of the dying’. Yes, we are all dying day by day, and we have a maximum of 36,500 days, provided we all live till the age of one hundred years. If we really consider our age, and make an assumption that we will be past our productive years beyond the age of 70, we do not have much time, and if we do not take notice, most probably we will end up with the same five regrets.
Why are we not achieving our goals?
First of all, we think that we have a lot of time on planet earth, which is false
We have not defined any goals which are inspiring, as the goal setting process itself is confined within the ‘socially acceptable’ norms, and we end up following the beaten track.
We want to make others happy even at the cost of our own happiness.
Our bad habits prevents us from achieving our goals
We are busy with shallow work, than deep work (thanks to the social media which gives us instant gratification through shallow work). In his book ‘Deep work’, Cal Newport explains this in detail. Once we are used to shallow work, over a period of time our brain loses the ability to do focused deep work.
We lack GRIT. In her book ‘GRIT’, Angela Duckworth explains how the power of passion and resilience helps us to achieve our goals.
And it is not our fault. The application designers are engineering addictions into their products. They create hooks to hook us. They make us to invest in their apps , so that we will go back to see the return on the investment. Whenever I make a post on insta ,fb,youtube…for that matter even linked in, I go back frequently to see the response, at the cost of my deep work. An application architect is successful when he is able to make his/her application a habit forming one for the user. When we feel lonely, we get into FB, and that becomes a habit. We are losing when they are winning. Each and every time we disrupt our deep work to attend the call of an application which is trivial we are losing. This is explained in detail in the book ‘Hooked – How to build habit forming products’ by Nir Eyal.
Let us be happier and regret less. Let us win over all bad addictions.